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Five things to know about dating a Paladin


By Aylania

Photos by Awyin

After a few experiences myself and after hours of listening to my disappointed friends, it seems you need to know a few things about the holy man in plate before you even consider dating a paladin.

It’s not that they are bad men, absolutely not. Their faith in the Light and in themselves can bring you to tears, but they seem to have a few habits in common - and you really need to know what you are letting yourself in for when you fall in love with a Paladin.

1. The man and his armour
The holy man in plate is vain. There are a few reasons why their armour is so bright. Firstly, they love to be together. If you see one there are mostly more around. Not only because they are his friends and buddies but also because they all wear shiny armour. They can see themselves reflected in the armour of their friends.

Then there is the reason that, on a sunny shining day, you can see them from afar. It’s not sure, because they don’t want to talk about it, but the common reason seems to be that they are not that brave alone. If you know there are friends around, they can not only depend on their own bubble but also on that of their friends.


Paladins and their shiny armor

The main question is, of course, do they take the shiny armour off. Well, if you want to go for a romantic date, don’t choose a spot close to the water or a lake. Even a small moon is enough to reflect the armour in the water, so they will look more at that than at you. Sometimes they “forget” to take it off when they go to bed, if you ask why, they will tell you that they need to be prepared if a battle starts in the middle of the night.

The man is so proud about his armour, they put much effort into making even more bright and shiny armour. Besides the white/gold combination, the red shining armour called Lighthouse is recently very popular according to one of my dear and fashionable friends. They spend hours and loads of gold to keep their armour bright and shining, if you’re lucky you might watch, while he tries to get all the dents out of his chest piece. If you’re really lucky you can see him doing that while he only wears a shirt. But sadly they mostly have a second favourite armour to wear at that moment.

2. The man and his Weapon
Every strong man feels love for their weapon. Of course you would say, they need that weapon to keep you safe. But if you watch them for a while, you will notice that they take it often in their hand before even the need to use is there. They never have to look where the weapon is. They know where to get it and how to handle it. They have spent hours of training learning how to use it with the most flair, hoping you will gasp if they draw their weapon, that you will even moan softly. And of course, most women do, just to please their man.

But try to be quiet once, just look and then you will hear them groaning when they take their weapon in their hand, not that loud, because they have learned to make less sound then the women around them, but they really do.

When you’re together on a hunt and they see a brother-in-arms close by, they will go to meet them. Let it look like they “accidentally” met. Then they will start talking about their weapon, how strong it is, how many kills it has made and then, if you cough loud enough, they will remember you’re there as well, and introduce you.

3. The man and his horse
The horse of the holy man in plate is as his owner. Never try to come between the man and the horse, their excuse will be they need her to stay alive in battle.


The man and his horse

As soon as they are old and strong enough they get a horse that’s ready for battle. But they will use the horse for every mile they need to ride. Even when you’re not able to ride with them they will probably tell you to meet there and they will ride to make the way free for you. It’s good they have the power to heal you, if you might get in trouble. They are mostly too far away to keep you safe from harm.

And by the time you learned how to ride… they have a stronger horse, all armoured, as shining as the brave man riding it. This horse runs faster then yours and they will leave you behind again.


A stronger horse

4. The man and his oaths
There are many oaths the man in plate can have. But for us women there is one most important oath to know about before you will even think about dating or marriage. This is the Chastity oath. If you think the man in plate wants his heir when he is young, you will get terribly disappointed. The man needs his mind to the battle, they will get too distracted if they have to think about their woman or children. They are afraid it will daze their mind and they will not be able to fight to stay alive. They can love you, they really can, but not when they are at war, in a battle or when they fight a veil dragon.

5. The man and his expectations after dating
The holy man in plate doesn’t have only bad sides - of course not - but you have to know how to keep them under control. If you know how to do that, he will be a great friend and lover. Realise beforehand they are, mostly, not interested in flirting and exciting and inventive liaisons. No, they wish to rush straight to the altar. After marriage they get their second thoughts. They discover it when doing their share of the washing up and shopping and along comes the patter of tiny feet. The holy man in plate realise he does not like to dig the garden when his plate get dirty and he get it too hot because he will not take it off while digging. Afterwards they will be grumping around in the kitchen moaning about the scratches on it. And if he hurts himself don't think you can bandage it… No matter good your first aid is, you’re not allowed to look closer, like he is scared you will tell him he shouldn’t act like a child.


Paladins don't like doing the garden

Things never to forget
The days we women were only seen as a trophy are over. Although a lot of men doesn’t see it that way. We don’t need a man, they are there to entertain us, not the other way around. We are independent, we choose our own professions, our own skills and more important our own man. So…. Know what you do when you want to ask them to marry you. Don’t take the first good looking man you see walking over the bridge while you and your friends are talking about the important things in life (men). Be sure he is the one you are really looking for. A marriage is nothing more than a name, that bind you to him. Be free instead and bind the men you like to you for as long as you want and no more. Go out with them, find out the things you like and argue about the things you don’t. Remember - marriage isn’t a must!

Many thanks to our long-suffering and much-valued holy men in plate who helped us with pictures, and to the lovely Amariel, mainly photographed by Awyin, and also by Aylania.


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